{"id":155,"date":"2024-07-30T17:10:57","date_gmt":"2024-07-30T17:10:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/pressbooks.ccconline.org\/accinterpersonal\/chapter\/improving-listening-competence\/"},"modified":"2026-03-24T20:28:48","modified_gmt":"2026-03-24T20:28:48","slug":"improving-listening-competence","status":"web-only","type":"chapter","link":"https:\/\/pressbooks.ccconline.org\/accinterpersonal\/chapter\/improving-listening-competence\/","title":{"raw":"5. Improving Listening Competence","rendered":"5. Improving Listening Competence"},"content":{"raw":"<div class=\"improving-listening-competence\">\r\n<h2>LEARNING OBJECTIVES<\/h2>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>Identify strategies for improving listening competence at each stage of the listening process.<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Summarize the characteristics of active listening.<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Apply critical-listening skills in interpersonal, educational, and mediated contexts.<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Practice empathetic listening skills.<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Discuss ways to improve listening competence in relational, professional, and cultural contexts.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">Many people admit that they could stand to improve their listening skills. This section will help us do that. In this section, we will learn strategies for developing and improving competence at each stage of the listening process. We will also define active listening and the behaviors that go along with it.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">Looking back to the types of listening discussed earlier, we will learn specific strategies for sharpening our critical and empathetic listening skills. In keeping with our focus on integrative learning, we will also apply the skills we have learned in academic, professional, and relational contexts and explore how culture and gender affect listening.<\/p>\r\n\r\n<h3>Listening Competence at Each Stage of the Listening Process<\/h3>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt\">We can develop competence within each stage of the listening process, as the following list indicates:<sup>119<\/sup><\/p>\r\n\r\n<h5>To improve listening at the receiving stage,<\/h5>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>prepare yourself to listen,<\/li>\r\n \t<li>discern between intentional messages and noise,<\/li>\r\n \t<li>concentrate on stimuli most relevant to your listening purpose(s) or goal(s),<\/li>\r\n \t<li>be mindful of the selection and attention process as much as possible,<\/li>\r\n \t<li>pay attention to turn-taking signals so you can follow the conversational flow, and<\/li>\r\n \t<li>avoid interrupting someone while they are speaking in order to maintain your ability to receive stimuli and listen.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<h5>To improve listening at the interpreting stage,<\/h5>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>identify main points and supporting points;<\/li>\r\n \t<li>use contextual clues from the person or environment to discern additional meaning;<\/li>\r\n \t<li>be aware of how a relational, cultural, or situational context can influence meaning;<\/li>\r\n \t<li>be aware of the different meanings of silence; and<\/li>\r\n \t<li>note differences in tone of voice and other paralinguistic cues that influence meaning.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<h5>To improve listening at the recalling stage,<\/h5>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>use multiple sensory channels to decode messages and make more complete memories;<\/li>\r\n \t<li>repeat, rephrase, and reorganize information to fit your cognitive preferences; and<\/li>\r\n \t<li>use mnemonic devices as a gimmick to help with recall.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<h5>To improve listening at the evaluating stage,<\/h5>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>separate facts, inferences, and judgments;<\/li>\r\n \t<li>be familiar with and able to identify persuasive strategies and fallacies of reasoning;<\/li>\r\n \t<li>assess the credibility of the speaker and the message; and<\/li>\r\n \t<li>be aware of your own biases and how your perceptual filters can create barriers to effective listening.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<h5>To improve listening at the responding stage,<\/h5>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>ask appropriate clarifying and follow-up questions and paraphrase information to check understanding,<\/li>\r\n \t<li>give feedback that is relevant to the speaker\u2019s purpose\/motivation for speaking,<\/li>\r\n \t<li>adapt your response to the speaker and the context, and<\/li>\r\n \t<li>do not let the preparation and rehearsal of your response diminish earlier stages of listening.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<h3>Active Listening<\/h3>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\"><strong>Active listening<\/strong> refers to the process of pairing outwardly visible positive listening behaviors with positive cognitive listening practices. Active listening can help address many of the environmental, physical, cognitive, and personal barriers to effective listening that we discussedearlier. The behaviors associated with active listening can also enhance informational, critical, and empathetic listening.<\/p>\r\n\r\n<h4>Active Listening Can Help Overcome Barriers to Effective Listening<\/h4>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">Being an active listener starts before you actually start receiving a message. Active listeners make strategic choices and take action in order to set up ideal listening conditions. Physical and environmental noises can often be managed by moving locations or by manipulating the lighting, temperature, or furniture. When possible, avoid important listening activities during times of distracting psychological or physiological noise. For example, we often know when we\u2019re going to be hungry, full, more awake, less awake, more anxious, or less anxious, and advance planning can alleviate the presence of these barriers. For college students, who often have some flexibility in their class schedules, knowing when you best listen can help you make strategic choices regarding what class to take when. And student options are increasing, as some colleges are offering classes in the overnight hours to accommodate working students and students who are just \u201cnight owls.\u201d<sup>120<\/sup> Of course, we don\u2019t always\u00a0have control over our schedule, in which case we will need to utilize other effective listening strategies that we will learn more about later in this chapter.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">In terms of cognitive barriers to effective listening, we can prime ourselves to listen by analyzing a listening situation before it begins. For example, you could ask yourself the following questions:<\/p>\r\n\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>\u201cWhat are my goals for listening to this message?\u201d<\/li>\r\n \t<li>\u201cHow does this message relate to me \/ affect my life?\u201d<\/li>\r\n \t<li>\u201cWhat listening type and style are most appropriate for this message?\u201d<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.9pt;margin-right: 7.3pt;text-indent: 0.05pt\">Effective listeners must work to maintain focus as much as possible and refocus when attention shifts or fades.<sup>121<\/sup> One way to do this is to find the motivation to listen. If you can identify intrinsic and or extrinsic motivations for listening to a particular message, then you will be more likely toremember the information presented. Ask yourself how a message could impact your life, your career, your intellect, or your relationships. This can help overcome our tendency toward selective attention. As senders of messages, we can help listeners by making the relevance of what we\u2019re saying clear and offering well- organized messages that are tailored for our listeners.We will learn much more about establishing relevance, organizing a message, and gaining the attention of an audience in public speaking contexts later in the book.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.9pt\">Given that we can process more words per minute than people can speak, we can engage in internal dialogue, making good use of our intrapersonal communication, to become a better listener. Three possibilities for internal dialogue include covert coaching, self-reinforcement, and covert questioning; explanations and examples of each follow:<sup>122<\/sup><\/p>\r\n\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li><strong>Covert<\/strong> <strong>coaching<\/strong> involves sending yourself messages containing advice about better listening, such as \u201cYou\u2019re getting distracted by things you have to do after work. Just focus on what your supervisor is saying now.\u201d<\/li>\r\n \t<li><strong>Self-reinforcement<\/strong> involves sending yourself affirmative and positive messages: \u201cYou\u2019re being a good active listener. This will help you do well on the next exam.\u201d<\/li>\r\n \t<li><strong>Covert questioning <\/strong>involves asking yourself questions about the content in ways that focus your attention and reinforce the material: \u201cWhat is the main idea from that PowerPoint slide?\u201d \u201cWhy is he talking about his brother in front of our neighbors?\u201d<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.45pt\">Internal dialogue is a more structured way to engage in active listening, but we can use more general approaches as well. I suggest that students occupy the \u201cextra\u201d channels in their mind with thoughts that are related to the primary message being received instead of thoughts that are unrelated. We can use those channels to resort, rephrase, and repeat what a speaker says. When we resort, we can help mentally repair disorganized messages. When we rephrase, we can put messages into our own words in ways that better fit our cognitive preferences. When we repeat, we can help messages transfer from short-term to long-term memory.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt\">Other tools can help with concentration and memory. <strong>Mental<\/strong> <strong>bracketing<\/strong> refers to the process of intentionally separating out intrusive or irrelevant thoughts that may distract you from listening.<sup>123<\/sup> This requires that we monitor our concentration and attention and be prepared to let thoughts that aren\u2019t related to a speaker\u2019s message pass through our minds without us giving them much attention.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\"><strong>Mnemonic<\/strong> <strong>devices<\/strong> are techniques that can aid in information recall.<sup>124<\/sup> Starting in ancient Greece and Rome, educators used these devices to help people remember information. They work by imposing order and organization on information. Three main mnemonic devices are acronyms, rhymes, and visualization, and examples of each follow:<\/p>\r\n\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li><strong>Acronyms.<\/strong> HOMES\u2014to help remember the Great Lakes (Huron, Ontario, Michigan, Erie, and Superior).<\/li>\r\n \t<li><strong>Rhyme. <\/strong>\u201cRighty tighty, lefty loosey\u201d\u2014to remember which way most light bulbs, screws, and other coupling devices turn to make them go in or out.<\/li>\r\n \t<li><strong>Visualization. <\/strong>Imagine seeing a glass of port wine (which is red) and the red navigation light on a boat to help remember that the red light on a boat is always on the port side, which will also help you remember that the blue light must be on the starboard side.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<h4>Active Listening Behaviors<\/h4>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt\">From the suggestions discussed previously, you can see that we can prepare for active listening in advance and engage in certain cognitive strategies to help us listen better. We also engage in active listening behaviors as we receive and process messages.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.8pt\">Eye contact is a key sign of active listening. Speakers usually interpret a listener\u2019s eye contact asa signal of attentiveness. While a lack of eye contact may indicate inattentiveness, it can also signal cognitive processing. When we look away to process new information, we usually do it unconsciously. Be aware, however, that your conversational partner may interpret this as not listening. If you really do need to take a moment to think about something, you could indicate that to the other person by saying, \u201cThat\u2019s new information to me. Give me just a second to thinkthrough it.\u201d We already learned the role that back- channel cues play in listening. An occasional head nod and \u201cuh-huh\u201d signal that you are paying attention. However, when we give these cuesas a form of \u201cautopilot\u201d listening, others can usually tell that we are pseudo-listening, and whether they call us on it or not, that impression could lead to negative judgments.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">A more direct way to indicate active listening is to reference previous statements made by the speaker. Norms of politeness usually call on us to reference a past statement or connect to the speaker\u2019s current thought before starting a conversational turn. Being able to summarize what someone said to ensure that the topic has been satisfactorily covered and understood or being able to segue in such a way that validates what the previous speaker said helps regulate conversational flow. Asking probing questions is another way to directly indicate listening and to keep a conversation going, since they encourage and invite a person to speak more.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">You can also ask questions that seek clarification and not just elaboration. Speakers should present complex information at a slower speaking rate than familiar information, but many will not. Remember that your nonverbal feedback can be useful for a speaker, as it signals that you are listening but also whether or not you understand. If a speaker fails to read your nonverbal feedback, you may need to follow up with verbal communication in the form of paraphrased messages and clarifying questions.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 13.6pt\">As active listeners, we want to be excited and engaged, but don\u2019t let excitement manifest itself in interruptions. Being an active listener means knowing when to maintain our role as listener and resist the urge to take a conversational turn. Research shows that people with higher social status are more likely to interrupt others, so keep this in mind and be prepared for it if you are speaking to a high- status person, or try to resist it if you are the high-status person in an interaction.<sup>125<\/sup><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 11.05pt\">Note-taking can also indicate active listening. Translating information through writing into our own cognitive structures and schemata allows us to better interpret and assimilate information. Of course, note-taking isn\u2019t always a viable option. It would be fairly awkward to take notes during a first date or a casual exchange between new coworkers. But in some situations where we wouldn\u2019t normally consider taking notes, a little awkwardness might be worth it for the sake of understanding and recalling the information. For example, many people don\u2019t think about taking notes when getting information from their doctor or banker. I actually invite students to take notes during informal meetings because I think they sometimes don\u2019t think about it or don\u2019t think it\u2019s appropriate. But many people would rather someone jot down notes instead of having to respond to follow-up questions on information that was already clearly conveyed. To help facilitate your note-taking, you might say something like \u201cDo you mind if I jot down some notes? This seems important.\u201d<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 39.4pt\"><img src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.ccconline.org\/accinterpersonal\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/197\/2024\/07\/image2-6.jpeg\" alt=\"image\" width=\"537.788871391076px\" height=\"460.96px\" \/><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-Normal\" style=\"text-align: left;margin-left: 12.95pt;margin-right: 0pt;text-indent: 0pt\"><em>Figure<\/em> <em>7.2<\/em> <a class=\"rId11\" href=\"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/boundless-communications\/chapter\/understanding-listening\/\"><em>Degrees<\/em> <em>of<\/em> <em>Active<\/em> <em>Listening<\/em><\/a> <em>is<\/em> <em>used<\/em> <em>under a<\/em> <a class=\"rId12\" href=\"https:\/\/creativecommons.org\/licenses\/by-sa\/2.0\/\"><em>CC<\/em> <em>BY-SA<\/em><\/a> <em>license.<\/em><\/p>\r\n\r\n<div style=\"text-align: left\">\r\n<table>\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29pt\">\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\"><strong>Repeating<\/strong><\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\"><strong>Paraphrasing<\/strong><\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\"><strong>Reflecting<\/strong><\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29pt\">\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\">Perceiving<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Perceiving<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Perceiving<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29.1pt\">\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\">Paying Attention<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Paying Attention<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Paying Attention<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29pt\">\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\">Remembering<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Remembering<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Remembering<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 73.15pt\">\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt;margin-right: 6.25pt\">Repeating the message using <strong><em>exactly<\/em><\/strong> <strong><em>the<\/em><\/strong> <strong><em>same <\/em><\/strong>words used by the speaker<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Thinking and Reasoning<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Thinking and Reasoning<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29.25pt\">\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\">Rendering<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Rendering the message using similar words and <strong><em>similar<\/em><\/strong> phrase<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Rending the message using <strong><em>your own<\/em><\/strong> words and sentence structure<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td><\/td>\r\n<td><\/td>\r\n<td><\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<\/tbody>\r\n<\/table>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: left\">\r\n<table>\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29pt\">\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\"><strong>Repeating<\/strong><\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\"><strong>Paraphrasing<\/strong><\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\"><strong>Reflecting<\/strong><\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29.25pt\">\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 0pt\"><\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">arrangement to the ones used by the speaker<\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\r\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 0pt\"><\/p>\r\n<\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td><\/td>\r\n<td><\/td>\r\n<td><\/td>\r\n<\/tr>\r\n<\/tbody>\r\n<\/table>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">In summary, active listening is exhibited through verbal and nonverbal cues, including steady eye contact with the speaker; smiling; slightly raised eyebrows; upright posture; body position that is leaned in toward the speaker; nonverbal back-channel cues such as head nods; verbal back- channel cues such as \u201cOK,\u201d \u201cmmhum,\u201d or \u201coh\u201d; and a lack of distracting mannerisms like doodling or fidgeting.<sup>126<\/sup><\/p>\r\n\r\n<h3>Listening in Relational Contexts<\/h3>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.95pt\">Listening plays a central role in establishing and maintaining our relationships.<sup>127<\/sup> Without some listening competence, we wouldn\u2019t be able to engage in the self-disclosure process, which is essential for the establishment of relationships. Newly acquainted people get to know each other through increasingly personal and reciprocal disclosures of personal information. In order to reciprocate a conversational partner\u2019s disclosure, we must process it through listening. Once relationships are formed, listening to others provides a psychological reward, through the simple act of recognition, that helps maintain our relationships. Listening to our relational partners and being listened to in return is part of the give-and-take of any interpersonal relationship. Our thoughts and experiences \u201cback up\u201d inside of us, and getting them out helps us maintain a positive balance.<sup>128<\/sup> So something as routine and seemingly pointless as listening to our romantic partner debrief the events of his or her day or our roommate recount his or her weekend back home shows that we are taking an interest in their lives and are willing to put our own needs and concerns aside for a moment to attend to their needs. Listening also closely ties to conflict, as a lack of listening often plays a large role in creating conflict, while effective listening helps us resolve it.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">Listening has relational implications throughout our lives, too. Parents who engage in competent listening behaviors with their children from a very young age make their children feel worthwhile and appreciated, which affects their development in terms of personality and character.<sup>129<\/sup> A lack of listening leads to feelings of loneliness, which results in lower self-esteem and higher degrees of anxiety. In fact, by the age of four or five years old, the empathy and recognition shown by the presence or lack of\u00a0listening has molded children\u2019s personalities in noticeable ways.<sup>130<\/sup> Children who have been listened to grow up expecting that others will be available and receptive to them. These children are therefore more likely to interact confidently with teachers, parents, and peers in ways that help develop communication competence that will be built on throughout their lives. Children who have not been listened to may come to expect that others will not want to listen to them, which leads to a lack of opportunities to practice, develop, and hone foundational communication skills. Fortunately for the more-listened-to children and unfortunately for the less-listened-to children, these early experiences become predispositions that don\u2019t change much as the children get older and may actually reinforce themselves and become stronger.<\/p>\r\n\r\n<h3>Listening and Culture<\/h3>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">Some cultures place more importance on listening than other cultures. In general, collectivistic cultures tend to value listening more than individualistic cultures that are more speaker oriented. The value placed on verbal and nonverbal meaning also varies by culture and influences how we communicate and listen. A <strong>low-context<\/strong> <strong>communication<\/strong> style is one in which much of the meaning generated within an interaction comes from the verbal communication used rather than nonverbal or contextual cues.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt\">Conversely, much of the meaning generated by a <strong>high-context communication <\/strong>style comes from nonverbal and contextual cues.<sup>131<\/sup> For example, US Americans of European descent generally use a low- context communication style, while people in East Asian and Latin American cultures use a high-context communication style.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt\">Contextual communication styles affect listening in many ways. Cultures with a high-context orientation generally use less verbal communication and value silence as a form of communication, which requires listeners to pay close attention to nonverbal signals and consider contextual influences on a message.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">Cultures with a low-context orientation must use more verbal communication and provide explicit details, since listeners aren\u2019t expected to derive meaning from the context. Note that people from low- context cultures may feel frustrated by the ambiguity of speakers from high-context cultures, while speakers from high-context cultures may feel overwhelmed or even insulted by the level of detail used by low-context communicators. Cultures with a low-context communication style also tend to have a\u00a0monochronic orientation toward time, while high-context cultures have a polychronic time orientation, which also affects listening.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.5pt\">Monochronic cultures like the United States value time and action-oriented listening styles, especially in professional contexts, because time is seen as a commodity that is scarce and must be managed.<sup>132<\/sup> This is evidenced by leaders in businesses and organizations who often request \u201cexecutive summaries\u201d that only focus on the most relevant information and who use statements like \u201cGet to the point.\u201d Polychronic cultures, which have more flexible listening styles, value people and content-oriented listening styles, which makes sense when we consider that polychronic cultures also tend to be more collectivistic and use a high-context communication style. In collectivistic cultures, indirect communication is preferred in cases where direct communication would be considered a threat to the other person\u2019s face (desired public image). For example, flatly turning down a business offer would be too direct, so a person might reply with a \u201cmaybe\u201d instead of a \u201cno.\u201d The person making the proposal, however, would be able to draw on contextual clues that they implicitly learned through socialization to interpret the \u201cmaybe\u201d as a \u201cno.\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n<h3>Listening and Gender<\/h3>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">Research on gender and listening has produced mixed results. As we\u2019ve already learned, much of the research on gender differences and communication has been influenced by gender stereotypes and falsely connected to biological differences. More recent research has found that people communicate in ways that conform to gender stereotypes in some situations and not in others, which shows that our communication is more influenced by societal expectations than by innate or gendered \u201chard-wiring.\u201d For example, through socialization, men are generally discouraged from expressing emotions in public. A woman sharing an emotional experience with a man may perceive the man\u2019s lack of emotional reaction as a sign of inattentiveness, especially if he typically shows more emotion during private interactions. The man, however, may be listening but withholding nonverbal expressiveness because of social norms. He may not realize that withholding those expressions could be seen as a lack of empathetic or active listening. Researchers also dispelled the belief that men interrupt more than women do, finding that men and women interrupt each other with similar frequency in cross-gender encounters.<sup>133<\/sup> So men may interrupt each other more in same-gender interactions as a conscious or\u00a0subconscious attempt to establish dominance because such behaviors are expected, as men are generally socialized to be more competitive than women. However, this type of competitive interrupting isn\u2019t as present in cross-gender interactions because the contexts have shifted.<\/p>\r\n\r\n<h2>KEY TAKEAWAYS<\/h2>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>Active listening is the process of pairing outwardly visible positive listening behaviors with positive cognitive listening practices and is characterized by mentally preparing yourself to listen, working to maintain focus on concentration, using appropriate verbal and nonverbal back-channel cues to signal attentiveness, and engaging in strategies like note taking and mentally reorganizing information to help with recall.<\/li>\r\n \t<li>In relational contexts, listening plays a central role in initiating relationships, as listening is required for mutual self-disclosure, and in maintaining relationships, as listening to our relational partners provides a psychological reward in the form of recognition. When people aren\u2019t or don\u2019t feel listened to, they may experience feelings of isolation or loneliness that can have negative effects throughout their lives.<\/li>\r\n \t<li>In cultural contexts, high- or low-context communication styles, monochronic or polychronic orientations toward time, and individualistic or collectivistic cultural values affect listening preferences and behaviors.<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Research regarding listening preferences and behaviors of men and women has been contradictory. While some differences in listening exist, many of them are based more on societal expectations for how men and women should listen rather than biological differences.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<h2>EXERCISE<\/h2>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 20pt;margin-right: 87.95pt;text-indent: 18.05pt\">1. Keep a \u201clistening log\u201d for part of your day. Note times when you feel like you exhibited competent listening behaviors and note times when listening became challenging. Analyze the log based on what you have learned in this section. Which positive listening skills helped you listen?<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 0pt\"><\/p>\r\n\r\n<\/div>","rendered":"<div class=\"improving-listening-competence\">\n<h2>LEARNING OBJECTIVES<\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li>Identify strategies for improving listening competence at each stage of the listening process.<\/li>\n<li>Summarize the characteristics of active listening.<\/li>\n<li>Apply critical-listening skills in interpersonal, educational, and mediated contexts.<\/li>\n<li>Practice empathetic listening skills.<\/li>\n<li>Discuss ways to improve listening competence in relational, professional, and cultural contexts.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">Many people admit that they could stand to improve their listening skills. This section will help us do that. In this section, we will learn strategies for developing and improving competence at each stage of the listening process. We will also define active listening and the behaviors that go along with it.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">Looking back to the types of listening discussed earlier, we will learn specific strategies for sharpening our critical and empathetic listening skills. In keeping with our focus on integrative learning, we will also apply the skills we have learned in academic, professional, and relational contexts and explore how culture and gender affect listening.<\/p>\n<h3>Listening Competence at Each Stage of the Listening Process<\/h3>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt\">We can develop competence within each stage of the listening process, as the following list indicates:<sup>119<\/sup><\/p>\n<h5>To improve listening at the receiving stage,<\/h5>\n<ul>\n<li>prepare yourself to listen,<\/li>\n<li>discern between intentional messages and noise,<\/li>\n<li>concentrate on stimuli most relevant to your listening purpose(s) or goal(s),<\/li>\n<li>be mindful of the selection and attention process as much as possible,<\/li>\n<li>pay attention to turn-taking signals so you can follow the conversational flow, and<\/li>\n<li>avoid interrupting someone while they are speaking in order to maintain your ability to receive stimuli and listen.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h5>To improve listening at the interpreting stage,<\/h5>\n<ul>\n<li>identify main points and supporting points;<\/li>\n<li>use contextual clues from the person or environment to discern additional meaning;<\/li>\n<li>be aware of how a relational, cultural, or situational context can influence meaning;<\/li>\n<li>be aware of the different meanings of silence; and<\/li>\n<li>note differences in tone of voice and other paralinguistic cues that influence meaning.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h5>To improve listening at the recalling stage,<\/h5>\n<ul>\n<li>use multiple sensory channels to decode messages and make more complete memories;<\/li>\n<li>repeat, rephrase, and reorganize information to fit your cognitive preferences; and<\/li>\n<li>use mnemonic devices as a gimmick to help with recall.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h5>To improve listening at the evaluating stage,<\/h5>\n<ul>\n<li>separate facts, inferences, and judgments;<\/li>\n<li>be familiar with and able to identify persuasive strategies and fallacies of reasoning;<\/li>\n<li>assess the credibility of the speaker and the message; and<\/li>\n<li>be aware of your own biases and how your perceptual filters can create barriers to effective listening.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h5>To improve listening at the responding stage,<\/h5>\n<ul>\n<li>ask appropriate clarifying and follow-up questions and paraphrase information to check understanding,<\/li>\n<li>give feedback that is relevant to the speaker\u2019s purpose\/motivation for speaking,<\/li>\n<li>adapt your response to the speaker and the context, and<\/li>\n<li>do not let the preparation and rehearsal of your response diminish earlier stages of listening.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>Active Listening<\/h3>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\"><strong>Active listening<\/strong> refers to the process of pairing outwardly visible positive listening behaviors with positive cognitive listening practices. Active listening can help address many of the environmental, physical, cognitive, and personal barriers to effective listening that we discussedearlier. The behaviors associated with active listening can also enhance informational, critical, and empathetic listening.<\/p>\n<h4>Active Listening Can Help Overcome Barriers to Effective Listening<\/h4>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">Being an active listener starts before you actually start receiving a message. Active listeners make strategic choices and take action in order to set up ideal listening conditions. Physical and environmental noises can often be managed by moving locations or by manipulating the lighting, temperature, or furniture. When possible, avoid important listening activities during times of distracting psychological or physiological noise. For example, we often know when we\u2019re going to be hungry, full, more awake, less awake, more anxious, or less anxious, and advance planning can alleviate the presence of these barriers. For college students, who often have some flexibility in their class schedules, knowing when you best listen can help you make strategic choices regarding what class to take when. And student options are increasing, as some colleges are offering classes in the overnight hours to accommodate working students and students who are just \u201cnight owls.\u201d<sup>120<\/sup> Of course, we don\u2019t always\u00a0have control over our schedule, in which case we will need to utilize other effective listening strategies that we will learn more about later in this chapter.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">In terms of cognitive barriers to effective listening, we can prime ourselves to listen by analyzing a listening situation before it begins. For example, you could ask yourself the following questions:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cWhat are my goals for listening to this message?\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cHow does this message relate to me \/ affect my life?\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cWhat listening type and style are most appropriate for this message?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.9pt;margin-right: 7.3pt;text-indent: 0.05pt\">Effective listeners must work to maintain focus as much as possible and refocus when attention shifts or fades.<sup>121<\/sup> One way to do this is to find the motivation to listen. If you can identify intrinsic and or extrinsic motivations for listening to a particular message, then you will be more likely toremember the information presented. Ask yourself how a message could impact your life, your career, your intellect, or your relationships. This can help overcome our tendency toward selective attention. As senders of messages, we can help listeners by making the relevance of what we\u2019re saying clear and offering well- organized messages that are tailored for our listeners.We will learn much more about establishing relevance, organizing a message, and gaining the attention of an audience in public speaking contexts later in the book.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.9pt\">Given that we can process more words per minute than people can speak, we can engage in internal dialogue, making good use of our intrapersonal communication, to become a better listener. Three possibilities for internal dialogue include covert coaching, self-reinforcement, and covert questioning; explanations and examples of each follow:<sup>122<\/sup><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Covert<\/strong> <strong>coaching<\/strong> involves sending yourself messages containing advice about better listening, such as \u201cYou\u2019re getting distracted by things you have to do after work. Just focus on what your supervisor is saying now.\u201d<\/li>\n<li><strong>Self-reinforcement<\/strong> involves sending yourself affirmative and positive messages: \u201cYou\u2019re being a good active listener. This will help you do well on the next exam.\u201d<\/li>\n<li><strong>Covert questioning <\/strong>involves asking yourself questions about the content in ways that focus your attention and reinforce the material: \u201cWhat is the main idea from that PowerPoint slide?\u201d \u201cWhy is he talking about his brother in front of our neighbors?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.45pt\">Internal dialogue is a more structured way to engage in active listening, but we can use more general approaches as well. I suggest that students occupy the \u201cextra\u201d channels in their mind with thoughts that are related to the primary message being received instead of thoughts that are unrelated. We can use those channels to resort, rephrase, and repeat what a speaker says. When we resort, we can help mentally repair disorganized messages. When we rephrase, we can put messages into our own words in ways that better fit our cognitive preferences. When we repeat, we can help messages transfer from short-term to long-term memory.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt\">Other tools can help with concentration and memory. <strong>Mental<\/strong> <strong>bracketing<\/strong> refers to the process of intentionally separating out intrusive or irrelevant thoughts that may distract you from listening.<sup>123<\/sup> This requires that we monitor our concentration and attention and be prepared to let thoughts that aren\u2019t related to a speaker\u2019s message pass through our minds without us giving them much attention.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\"><strong>Mnemonic<\/strong> <strong>devices<\/strong> are techniques that can aid in information recall.<sup>124<\/sup> Starting in ancient Greece and Rome, educators used these devices to help people remember information. They work by imposing order and organization on information. Three main mnemonic devices are acronyms, rhymes, and visualization, and examples of each follow:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Acronyms.<\/strong> HOMES\u2014to help remember the Great Lakes (Huron, Ontario, Michigan, Erie, and Superior).<\/li>\n<li><strong>Rhyme. <\/strong>\u201cRighty tighty, lefty loosey\u201d\u2014to remember which way most light bulbs, screws, and other coupling devices turn to make them go in or out.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Visualization. <\/strong>Imagine seeing a glass of port wine (which is red) and the red navigation light on a boat to help remember that the red light on a boat is always on the port side, which will also help you remember that the blue light must be on the starboard side.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h4>Active Listening Behaviors<\/h4>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt\">From the suggestions discussed previously, you can see that we can prepare for active listening in advance and engage in certain cognitive strategies to help us listen better. We also engage in active listening behaviors as we receive and process messages.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.8pt\">Eye contact is a key sign of active listening. Speakers usually interpret a listener\u2019s eye contact asa signal of attentiveness. While a lack of eye contact may indicate inattentiveness, it can also signal cognitive processing. When we look away to process new information, we usually do it unconsciously. Be aware, however, that your conversational partner may interpret this as not listening. If you really do need to take a moment to think about something, you could indicate that to the other person by saying, \u201cThat\u2019s new information to me. Give me just a second to thinkthrough it.\u201d We already learned the role that back- channel cues play in listening. An occasional head nod and \u201cuh-huh\u201d signal that you are paying attention. However, when we give these cuesas a form of \u201cautopilot\u201d listening, others can usually tell that we are pseudo-listening, and whether they call us on it or not, that impression could lead to negative judgments.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">A more direct way to indicate active listening is to reference previous statements made by the speaker. Norms of politeness usually call on us to reference a past statement or connect to the speaker\u2019s current thought before starting a conversational turn. Being able to summarize what someone said to ensure that the topic has been satisfactorily covered and understood or being able to segue in such a way that validates what the previous speaker said helps regulate conversational flow. Asking probing questions is another way to directly indicate listening and to keep a conversation going, since they encourage and invite a person to speak more.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">You can also ask questions that seek clarification and not just elaboration. Speakers should present complex information at a slower speaking rate than familiar information, but many will not. Remember that your nonverbal feedback can be useful for a speaker, as it signals that you are listening but also whether or not you understand. If a speaker fails to read your nonverbal feedback, you may need to follow up with verbal communication in the form of paraphrased messages and clarifying questions.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 13.6pt\">As active listeners, we want to be excited and engaged, but don\u2019t let excitement manifest itself in interruptions. Being an active listener means knowing when to maintain our role as listener and resist the urge to take a conversational turn. Research shows that people with higher social status are more likely to interrupt others, so keep this in mind and be prepared for it if you are speaking to a high- status person, or try to resist it if you are the high-status person in an interaction.<sup>125<\/sup><\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 11.05pt\">Note-taking can also indicate active listening. Translating information through writing into our own cognitive structures and schemata allows us to better interpret and assimilate information. Of course, note-taking isn\u2019t always a viable option. It would be fairly awkward to take notes during a first date or a casual exchange between new coworkers. But in some situations where we wouldn\u2019t normally consider taking notes, a little awkwardness might be worth it for the sake of understanding and recalling the information. For example, many people don\u2019t think about taking notes when getting information from their doctor or banker. I actually invite students to take notes during informal meetings because I think they sometimes don\u2019t think about it or don\u2019t think it\u2019s appropriate. But many people would rather someone jot down notes instead of having to respond to follow-up questions on information that was already clearly conveyed. To help facilitate your note-taking, you might say something like \u201cDo you mind if I jot down some notes? This seems important.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 39.4pt\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.ccconline.org\/accinterpersonal\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/197\/2024\/07\/image2-6.jpeg\" alt=\"image\" width=\"537.788871391076px\" height=\"460.96px\" \/><\/p>\n<p class=\"import-Normal\" style=\"text-align: left;margin-left: 12.95pt;margin-right: 0pt;text-indent: 0pt\"><em>Figure<\/em> <em>7.2<\/em> <a class=\"rId11\" href=\"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/boundless-communications\/chapter\/understanding-listening\/\"><em>Degrees<\/em> <em>of<\/em> <em>Active<\/em> <em>Listening<\/em><\/a> <em>is<\/em> <em>used<\/em> <em>under a<\/em> <a class=\"rId12\" href=\"https:\/\/creativecommons.org\/licenses\/by-sa\/2.0\/\"><em>CC<\/em> <em>BY-SA<\/em><\/a> <em>license.<\/em><\/p>\n<div style=\"text-align: left\">\n<table>\n<tbody>\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29pt\">\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\"><strong>Repeating<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\"><strong>Paraphrasing<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\"><strong>Reflecting<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29pt\">\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\">Perceiving<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Perceiving<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Perceiving<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29.1pt\">\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\">Paying Attention<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Paying Attention<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Paying Attention<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29pt\">\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\">Remembering<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Remembering<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Remembering<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 73.15pt\">\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt;margin-right: 6.25pt\">Repeating the message using <strong><em>exactly<\/em><\/strong> <strong><em>the<\/em><\/strong> <strong><em>same <\/em><\/strong>words used by the speaker<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Thinking and Reasoning<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Thinking and Reasoning<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29.25pt\">\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\">Rendering<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">Rendering the message using similar words and <strong><em>similar<\/em><\/strong> phrase<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\">Rending the message using <strong><em>your own<\/em><\/strong> words and sentence structure<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td><\/td>\n<td><\/td>\n<td><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"text-align: left\">\n<table>\n<tbody>\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29pt\">\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.35pt\"><strong>Repeating<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\"><strong>Paraphrasing<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.25pt\"><strong>Reflecting<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr class=\"TableNormal-R\" style=\"height: 29.25pt\">\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 0pt\">\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 5.4pt\">arrangement to the ones used by the speaker<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"TableNormal-C\" style=\"padding: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0pt;border: solid #000000 0.5pt\">\n<p class=\"import-TableParagraph\" style=\"margin-left: 0pt\">\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td><\/td>\n<td><\/td>\n<td><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">In summary, active listening is exhibited through verbal and nonverbal cues, including steady eye contact with the speaker; smiling; slightly raised eyebrows; upright posture; body position that is leaned in toward the speaker; nonverbal back-channel cues such as head nods; verbal back- channel cues such as \u201cOK,\u201d \u201cmmhum,\u201d or \u201coh\u201d; and a lack of distracting mannerisms like doodling or fidgeting.<sup>126<\/sup><\/p>\n<h3>Listening in Relational Contexts<\/h3>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.95pt\">Listening plays a central role in establishing and maintaining our relationships.<sup>127<\/sup> Without some listening competence, we wouldn\u2019t be able to engage in the self-disclosure process, which is essential for the establishment of relationships. Newly acquainted people get to know each other through increasingly personal and reciprocal disclosures of personal information. In order to reciprocate a conversational partner\u2019s disclosure, we must process it through listening. Once relationships are formed, listening to others provides a psychological reward, through the simple act of recognition, that helps maintain our relationships. Listening to our relational partners and being listened to in return is part of the give-and-take of any interpersonal relationship. Our thoughts and experiences \u201cback up\u201d inside of us, and getting them out helps us maintain a positive balance.<sup>128<\/sup> So something as routine and seemingly pointless as listening to our romantic partner debrief the events of his or her day or our roommate recount his or her weekend back home shows that we are taking an interest in their lives and are willing to put our own needs and concerns aside for a moment to attend to their needs. Listening also closely ties to conflict, as a lack of listening often plays a large role in creating conflict, while effective listening helps us resolve it.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">Listening has relational implications throughout our lives, too. Parents who engage in competent listening behaviors with their children from a very young age make their children feel worthwhile and appreciated, which affects their development in terms of personality and character.<sup>129<\/sup> A lack of listening leads to feelings of loneliness, which results in lower self-esteem and higher degrees of anxiety. In fact, by the age of four or five years old, the empathy and recognition shown by the presence or lack of\u00a0listening has molded children\u2019s personalities in noticeable ways.<sup>130<\/sup> Children who have been listened to grow up expecting that others will be available and receptive to them. These children are therefore more likely to interact confidently with teachers, parents, and peers in ways that help develop communication competence that will be built on throughout their lives. Children who have not been listened to may come to expect that others will not want to listen to them, which leads to a lack of opportunities to practice, develop, and hone foundational communication skills. Fortunately for the more-listened-to children and unfortunately for the less-listened-to children, these early experiences become predispositions that don\u2019t change much as the children get older and may actually reinforce themselves and become stronger.<\/p>\n<h3>Listening and Culture<\/h3>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">Some cultures place more importance on listening than other cultures. In general, collectivistic cultures tend to value listening more than individualistic cultures that are more speaker oriented. The value placed on verbal and nonverbal meaning also varies by culture and influences how we communicate and listen. A <strong>low-context<\/strong> <strong>communication<\/strong> style is one in which much of the meaning generated within an interaction comes from the verbal communication used rather than nonverbal or contextual cues.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt\">Conversely, much of the meaning generated by a <strong>high-context communication <\/strong>style comes from nonverbal and contextual cues.<sup>131<\/sup> For example, US Americans of European descent generally use a low- context communication style, while people in East Asian and Latin American cultures use a high-context communication style.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt\">Contextual communication styles affect listening in many ways. Cultures with a high-context orientation generally use less verbal communication and value silence as a form of communication, which requires listeners to pay close attention to nonverbal signals and consider contextual influences on a message.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 10.35pt\">Cultures with a low-context orientation must use more verbal communication and provide explicit details, since listeners aren\u2019t expected to derive meaning from the context. Note that people from low- context cultures may feel frustrated by the ambiguity of speakers from high-context cultures, while speakers from high-context cultures may feel overwhelmed or even insulted by the level of detail used by low-context communicators. Cultures with a low-context communication style also tend to have a\u00a0monochronic orientation toward time, while high-context cultures have a polychronic time orientation, which also affects listening.<\/p>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 5.95pt;margin-right: 7.5pt\">Monochronic cultures like the United States value time and action-oriented listening styles, especially in professional contexts, because time is seen as a commodity that is scarce and must be managed.<sup>132<\/sup> This is evidenced by leaders in businesses and organizations who often request \u201cexecutive summaries\u201d that only focus on the most relevant information and who use statements like \u201cGet to the point.\u201d Polychronic cultures, which have more flexible listening styles, value people and content-oriented listening styles, which makes sense when we consider that polychronic cultures also tend to be more collectivistic and use a high-context communication style. In collectivistic cultures, indirect communication is preferred in cases where direct communication would be considered a threat to the other person\u2019s face (desired public image). For example, flatly turning down a business offer would be too direct, so a person might reply with a \u201cmaybe\u201d instead of a \u201cno.\u201d The person making the proposal, however, would be able to draw on contextual clues that they implicitly learned through socialization to interpret the \u201cmaybe\u201d as a \u201cno.\u201d<\/p>\n<h3>Listening and Gender<\/h3>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 6pt;margin-right: 7.3pt\">Research on gender and listening has produced mixed results. As we\u2019ve already learned, much of the research on gender differences and communication has been influenced by gender stereotypes and falsely connected to biological differences. More recent research has found that people communicate in ways that conform to gender stereotypes in some situations and not in others, which shows that our communication is more influenced by societal expectations than by innate or gendered \u201chard-wiring.\u201d For example, through socialization, men are generally discouraged from expressing emotions in public. A woman sharing an emotional experience with a man may perceive the man\u2019s lack of emotional reaction as a sign of inattentiveness, especially if he typically shows more emotion during private interactions. The man, however, may be listening but withholding nonverbal expressiveness because of social norms. He may not realize that withholding those expressions could be seen as a lack of empathetic or active listening. Researchers also dispelled the belief that men interrupt more than women do, finding that men and women interrupt each other with similar frequency in cross-gender encounters.<sup>133<\/sup> So men may interrupt each other more in same-gender interactions as a conscious or\u00a0subconscious attempt to establish dominance because such behaviors are expected, as men are generally socialized to be more competitive than women. However, this type of competitive interrupting isn\u2019t as present in cross-gender interactions because the contexts have shifted.<\/p>\n<h2>KEY TAKEAWAYS<\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li>Active listening is the process of pairing outwardly visible positive listening behaviors with positive cognitive listening practices and is characterized by mentally preparing yourself to listen, working to maintain focus on concentration, using appropriate verbal and nonverbal back-channel cues to signal attentiveness, and engaging in strategies like note taking and mentally reorganizing information to help with recall.<\/li>\n<li>In relational contexts, listening plays a central role in initiating relationships, as listening is required for mutual self-disclosure, and in maintaining relationships, as listening to our relational partners provides a psychological reward in the form of recognition. When people aren\u2019t or don\u2019t feel listened to, they may experience feelings of isolation or loneliness that can have negative effects throughout their lives.<\/li>\n<li>In cultural contexts, high- or low-context communication styles, monochronic or polychronic orientations toward time, and individualistic or collectivistic cultural values affect listening preferences and behaviors.<\/li>\n<li>Research regarding listening preferences and behaviors of men and women has been contradictory. While some differences in listening exist, many of them are based more on societal expectations for how men and women should listen rather than biological differences.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2>EXERCISE<\/h2>\n<p class=\"import-BodyText\" style=\"margin-left: 20pt;margin-right: 87.95pt;text-indent: 18.05pt\">1. Keep a \u201clistening log\u201d for part of your day. Note times when you feel like you exhibited competent listening behaviors and note times when listening became challenging. Analyze the log based on what you have learned in this section. 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